Transformation

I know what it’s like to feel absolutely ugly. Through middle school and much of high school I was skinny, flat-chested, pimply, brace-faced and donned a bad perm. The popular clan of boys in school would make the sound “flt” when they passed me in the halls, calling attention to and making fun of my flat chest for anyone nearby to hear. At parties, when all the teens would gather round and play spin the bottle, boys would quit the game when the bottle pointed to me, just in time to avoid a kiss. I had tons of friends, but was considered the witty one, fun to be around, and never had a date. It was lonely and humiliating.

I know what it’s like to feel absolutely beautiful. By college, I developed, was envied by my peers as “thin” rather than ridiculed as “skinny”, and could date pretty much any guy I wanted. I was suddenly pursued by my university’s top athletes, most popular frat boys, and most handsome leaders—basically the same types who would never have looked my way in high school. The differences in social treatment from all sorts of people, be they men, women, teachers, strangers or friends, that I’ve experienced based solely upon my appearance are limitless. I continue to note them (and admittedly take advantage of them) today. I forgive my early tormentors and those who, perhaps unconsciously, offered me second-class treatment in my ugly years. But I’ll never forget how different life is when you’re considered unattractive by our culture’s standards.